Life & Social Skills

Life & Social Skills

Ages: 22+

Finding the Activities and Hobbies that Make You Happy

Finding the Activities and Hobbies that Make You Happy

Leisure skills are what you do with your free time, both at home and in the community. Figuring out which activities and hobbies you like helps you find joy and fulfillment.

You may be completely in charge of your time or you may have loved ones or staff helping you structure your day. It’s important to find things you like to do and learn how to balance your day with your work or education, responsibilities and activities for fun or entertainment.

We all have things we need to get done and appointments like doctor’s visits or therapists. It’s essential to make time for the different aspects of our life and when it’s best to do the fun things and have opportunities to connect with others.

Picking Activities to Fit Your Interests

Think about whatever hobbies, activities, friendships and romantic relationships are right for you. If you need help finding activities that interest you, think about what kinds of things sound enjoyable. Do you hate sports but love video games? Are their related clubs or meetups? For help with friendships see this article in the Milestones Autism Planning (MAP) Tool.

Try out different activities and see what makes you feel happy when you are doing it. Trying one or two classes or club meetings allows you to sample an idea without a long term commitment. Though sometimes you need to give it more time to know what the experience is like. For people who have anxiety or find change or social activities challenging, this might be much more gradual like just getting to the parking lot for five minutes.

Your interests may change over time so if you didn’t like something when you were younger, you might like it now. Or a particular group or class may not be right for you but the topic or sport might be. Maybe you need to find a group you like better.

Not everyone has access to a variety of activities, the time or ability to pay for them. There are many things you can do for free or for very little money, such as doing an arts and crafts project, puzzles, or exploring a free board game or other interest group. Visit different parks or trails for outdoor walks looking for birds or other sights. Local libraries often offer free classes or interest group meetings. Some museums may have free admission or discounts for people with disabilities. A membership at your favorite museum or other organization may be economical if it includes free admissions.

Created by self-advocates for self-advocates, the Milestones Self-Advocate Social Group is a community designed to build friendships, share common interests and explore topics of interest. Find out more here.

There are apps like MeetUp and social media options like Facebook Groups that may give you different ideas to explore. Think about safety before meeting up, like is it in a public place? The Safety Strategies in the Community for Adults article in the MAP has more tips.

Consider different things you like to do by yourself vs. social interactions and group activities.

Be aware that you may have preferences that are about what you are drawn to (such as art or music) vs autism preferences, such as sensory issues you need to honor. Many autistic people have sensory issues, meaning they may experience touch, sound, light/seeing, smell or taste in a much more intense or much lower degree than neurotypical people. For example, you may find that outdoor sounds, smells and insects buzzing, flying and crawling bother you.

You can find ways to adapt like avoiding places that are crowded or that have certain smells you don’t like. Or carrying a small sensory ball to squeeze or wearing headphones that may help you enjoy being outdoors without as much of that sensory stress.

Daily Schedule and Breaks

It’s important to learn how to manage your schedule, from when you wake up to how the day flows into evening and bedtime. Think about each of the areas of your life - your job, therapy, social/friendship opportunities, relaxation and sleep. Plan when you will take a break and your evening so you get enough sleep. The Milestones Sleep Tool Kit provides information and tips.

If you're working, think about how to fit in different clubs, groups or events you might enjoy. If you are interested in these but nervous, seek help from your therapist, counselor or if you’re part of a social skills group. The Milestones free autism Helpdesk is here to support you and connect you with resources.

You may find it helpful to have a visual schedule on your phone, a wipe off board or a piece of paper. It gives you a sense of a routine, what to anticipate and a way to be able to build in different activities such as work and choice time when you can pick what you want to do. Tools like Google Keep can be handy for schedules. The Milestones Visual Support Tool Kit provides tips and advice.

Using the Google Calendar on your phone and connecting it to a fitness watch such as an Apple Watch can help with reminders.

Learn to identify when you're getting overwhelmed and coping strategies, so you build that self-awareness and what helps you feel better. If you know that something is going to be overwhelming you will want to build in time to decompress. Ask for help when something is difficult.

Preparation, Enrichment and Goals

Build self awareness for what may cause a meltdown such as overscheduling, and what you need to help you manage sensory issues that may be triggers. Two self-advocates share strategies they use to manage their sensory challenges here including light, sound and smell starting with assessing your needs. Also visit the managing sensory issues article in the MAP for more information.

Autistic people often struggle with or at least don’t seek out new activities. New can be challenging. Prepare for new activities and experiences with what to expect by asking friends or relatives who may have done them, checking online videos from trusted sources or just talking it through with someone.

It’s great to seek out friends who share your interests by exploring related clubs, meetups or social media groups. Start by thinking about the people you are closest with and consider whether they are passionate about some of the same topics you are. Share your interests in short sentences and see their reaction.

If you enjoy activities at home like baking or cooking, see if family or friends would like to join you.

Enjoying Night Life ... Safely

Having fun dating, visiting bars and going out enjoying night life is great. It is important to balance that fun with staying safe and making sure you get enough sleep and can get up for work or school the next morning. While drinking alcohol is part of night life, part of safety is making sure you don't drink too much, which can make you sick and can cause you to lose control.

Never drink alcohol and drive. Drinking and driving is against the law but it is also very dangerous. If you are stopped by police and have been drinking above the limit allowed in your state, or you have been using illegal drugs or have them in your car, you will be in trouble. See this article in the MAP on how to interact with the police, but the best approach is to try to not do something that would cause you to be stopped by police.

Understand how drinking alcohol may impact your prescription medications you take. People can become addicted to alcohol or certain drugs that can cause you many problems. Drinking alcohol because you're anxious or upset and think it will make you feel better will not make you feel better in the long run. Seeking help to deal with what is bothering you from family you trust, your doctor or therapist is far better. This Self Care and Mental Health for Adults article in the MAP Tool has useful information about seeking therapy and issues like depression and anxiety.

For Families with More Impacted Adults Needing More Support

It is important to find activities your loved one can enjoy, both with other people or to entertain themself on their own. Work with your state or county Department of Developmental Disabilities to identify adapted social and recreational opportunities for your loved one. The Milestones Resource Center and Calendar include social recreation activities in Northeast Ohio you can explore. The Milestones Helpdesk can provide you with suggestions as well.

Using visual schedules or charts can be helpful, or social stories to help prepare them for what to expect for an activity. To help them with their schedule, you can use an Apple Watch to insert verbal prompts to the calendar, such as "..., I am ready to do ..." The Milestones Visual Support Tool Kit gives tips and advice.

At any adapted activities explain to them how your loved one communicates including any adaptive devices or picture systems they use.

Even if your adult really enjoyed activities that are for school aged children, you'll need to help them adjust to the reality that they can’t go to actual children’s activities. It’s fine to like the activity but they can’t do them with children. For example they can have fun with Beyblades, Pokemon, Legos or My Little Pony (bronies), but they can't attend a related club or group that's for kids.

In addition to adapted activities, seek opportunities for your loved one to spend time with people with all abilities and interests.

Additional Resource

Milestones Visual Supports Tool Kit

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