School Tips and Strategies for Teens

During the School Year: Supporting Your Teen at Home

A typical challenge for teens is getting ready for school and the transition home afterwards. Waking up in time each morning can be a struggle. So build a routine you agree on before school starts, such as setting their alarm at what time and what they do first after they wake up. What does their after school routine looks like when they first get back home?

Talk with your teen about how their day went. Depending on their level of functioning you might make a routine of asking their highs and lows, meaning what were your favorite things about school today and what were challenges. Questions like, “How was your day?'' may get you a short answer like “Fine.” Instead, try an open-ended question that is specific like, “What are you learning about in math?” Listen to their perspective.

Visit the Back to School article in the Milestones Autism Planning (MAP) Tool for making a smooth transition each school year.

Balancing Learning, Activities, Fun and Stress Relief

Be aware that some teens can hold it together at school and they sit still all day. It’s important to understand they may come home and release that tension in different ways. Giving them a chance to let off steam and de-stress in whatever way they express it is important. Understand your teen might show more tics, stimming or whatever autistic traits that they’re trying to control during the day. We call this ability to hold it all in “masking.”

You may notice that if they’re on medication to manage the school day that it wears off when they get home. You may want to check with your teen’s medical provider if they have more challenging behaviors.

Balance having fun and taking breaks with teaching life skills and doing therapy with your child. Teens have most of their day scheduled, while needing to conform to school, adult and peer expectations. Help them learn how to take a break, and share when they need help or feel overwhelmed. Learning to take breaks heads off problem behavior while teaching making smart choices for your teen.

As your teen develops skills, help them gradually be able to express their needs, strengths and what they’re working on to develop self-awareness and eventually be able to share that with teachers, friends and other professionals to best help them. For example, how to write an email and other ways each teacher and staff like to communicate. It is important for them to learn how to ask for help when something is difficult.

Work with your teen on developing their own self calming strategies proactively and incorporating them into their schedule. Try different types of outlets such as physical fitness, creative and sensory outlets. Approaches like eating crunchy foods or doing isometric exercises that an occupational therapist could provide may help.

Collaborating with Your Teen's School Team

Check in with your teen’s teacher, interventionist, counselor and behavior specialist periodically if you are having challenges. Let them know if there are issues you are dealing with at home to see if they are seeing similar things at school. The teacher may have suggestions that can help you at home and you may have ideas for school. Coordinating the message and approach at school and home can help your teen.

Monitor your teen’s progress and grades. What do their homework assignments look like? The Milestones Homework Tool Kit gives tips for homework success and building studying skills.

If homework becomes difficult for your teen discuss it with the teacher to see if the quantity is appropriate. Could they do a shorter version of the homework that still gives them sufficient practice, such as every other math problem? This should be an accommodation in your teen's Individualized Education Program (IEP). Tracking the homework and how long it takes your teen to do different assignments for each class can help document for the teacher and interventionist the need for this accommodation.

Your teen may qualify for an accommodation in their IEP of extended time on exams. This means they get a set percentage of extra time such as time and a half or double time. They could also have an accommodation to take tests in a separate testing room which reduces distractions such as background sounds of students tapping pencils, etc.

For state testing your school may conduct, you can get a waiver (not take it) or your teen may be able to get an alternative assessment. They can have accommodations like someone asks the questions and helps write down your teen’s answers.

The Milestones School Tool Kit provides useful information on a variety of topics and the Milestones free autism Helpdesk is here for you to connect you with resources and advice.

For More Impacted Teens

Before the school year starts, see if you can work with their teacher or interventionist to make a social story that shows the classrooms, hallway, where the bathrooms are, their schedule with pictures showing each schedule like their locker.

If your teen isn’t verbal, share how they communicate and what approaches and tools they use such as device, visual supports or sign language. If they do not have a means to communicate, this should be a top priority on the IEP and for the school team.

A picture schedule breaking out step by step instructions with photos or graphics can help you teach something like getting ready for school. For example you could tape laminated picture cards on the bathroom mirror or have them on a metal ring for your teen to flip through as they complete each step. You can use this type of visual for any activity to understand the steps.

Impact of Sensory on School

Discuss your teen’s sensory issues and other needs with the interventionist, teacher(s) and an occupational therapist, and what strategies and accommodations might help. For example you could ask if there are things they could do like taking a break to walk down the hall when they are overwhelmed. Or could they be given an activity like push a cart with something heavy in it.

Make sure any recommended accommodations are incorporated into the schedule across all teachers and at home to reinforce the self calming strategies.

In typical classes there are so many colors and decorations on the wall it is a very distracting and overwhelming environment that may impact how teens feel and behave.

Are teens talking and other background sounds distracting them? This is especially challenging when taking tests.

Discuss with your teen which food options will work best for their sensory needs for school lunches and snacks. Do they prefer to bring or buy depending also on costs?

Are there things in the various classrooms, eating, or larger school meetings (such as auditorium) environments that are harder for your teen because of sensory issues that you can work with school to help with? Sounds of people screaming and moving quickly around in hallways between classes, or a crowded auditorium with many people talking at the same time, echoing/clashing sounds and loud microphone with static can be difficult for autistic teens.

Priming, which means preparing your teen for an upcoming activity can help. For example, does your teen need to review a social story or review the upcoming schedule of the class? They could have their own self-check in mechanism based on set times with guiding questions, such as am I on task? Help them picture what will happen if they are able to handle the class, and discuss what their motivation is to stay on task

Courses like gym, music, etc may pose additional sensory challenges. Ask if there are alternative classes that might fulfill the Physical Education requirement. Instead of courses like music, could they give your teen different options like music history or music appreciation instead. A summer class may be shorter and a different setting to consider.